I'm so glad you started writing! This piece hit me with so many emotions similar to the ones you talked about. It's difficult to break through and understand, but you do it well. You'll find that cafe where the owner shares a musical taste similar to yours, and the ladies at the salon will be blessed to have you as a part of their lives, wherever that may be. Cheers Rez.
I could so relate to this. After 3 years in Berlin I realised it’s like you exactly described - a drift. London, Mumbai, NYC feels more like the places where you’re seen and can create real community and space. All the best with finding your favourite places. The journey matters. The destination/s show up in the end ✨✨
Aww thank you for reading! I feel the same about those places too! Let’s see what happens but I’m definitely in a better space now :) And I hope it works out for you too!! x
I resonate so much with what you're saying. I too have been living in Berlin for three years now. I am German so living here is easy for me in so many ways. But before living here, I was living Canada, a stone's throw away from the Rocky Mountains. A very different lifestyle to the one I have now. Back then, my weekends were filled with mountain adventures. These days they're filled with art galleries, wine bars, events. Not one better than the other but I do have to say that life in Berlin has left me feeling hollow lately. I've been chasing a life of materialism, acceptance and trying to fit in that I don't even want. I know why I am here but I also know that I won't be here forever.
Ah! Thank you! A lot of it very relatable. I always felt that it's like "you can have it all here" but in the end you feel kind of left with nothing. And people keep leaving, it's a very transitional place. =( Also keep stalking my neighbors so we become friends but I should probably go back to Georgia if I need neighborly connections haha!
I loved this Rez!! 🥹 Your piece was very touching but also showed how not everything is meant to be and that’s okay. You’re on your journey of growth and it’s beautiful to see that maybe Berlin isn’t for you and you’re going to explore further. Thank you for taking us along, sending you lots and lots of love 🤍
A powerful insight. I've just moved here after spending 5 years in London. I'm a little bit too fresh to make a judgment call on how much this city will become a home to me. But your words about the camaraderie in London hit home. When I lived there, it felt like everybody was struggling to keep their head above water and there was some beauty in that. Where we were all united in the struggle and sharing in the pain and the pleasure that ensued.
Thanks so much for reading Paddy, yes I definitely feel that. And I mean, everyone will have their own experience of Berlin but I think I feel like this for a number of reasons but I really do hope you have a lovely time here!
Well articulated. Fascinating to read that London offered that integrated community feeling. I never found it in Paris or NYC personally, only in the expat hubs of Yangon or Nairobi (with their attending challenges). Keep on writing!
Wow, this really touched me, Rez. I relate to every word you've written. I've been living here for eight years, and everything I used to love about this city just irritates me these days. I don't feel at home here anymore. I lived in the UK for twelve years, six of which were in London, and I miss it so much. I feel very nostalgic about my life back then, but I'm not sure if moving back would be the right decision.
Berlin feels like a golden cage for many of us. My rent is very cheap, my salary is good working for a corporate company, and generally, it's cheaper here than in most other European cities. However, despite these advantages, it's not enough for me. I no longer feel inspired by this city. I was trying to explain this to my therapist the other day; it feels like I've outgrown the city, and it doesn't nourish my soul anymore.
I have some travel plans over the winter, so I will be away quite a bit, but in the spring, I seriously want to consider where to move next.
Thank you for reading! It's a tough one isn't it, it's like you know there's more out there but you're right it's these little things like the cheap rent and your job etc that kind of keep you here but I just can't anymore. Thank you for sharing your insight too! <3
Really enjoyed reading these mixed feelings you have about Berlin. I've been living in Berlin for four years, and personally I love it. I keep the club scene at arm's length. I sometimes go along with friends, but I probably only go a handful of times per year. Clubbing can be fun, but I agree, it 1) is awfully repetitive and 2) just doesn't give my soul anything. I also agree with you that Berlin attracts a lot of lost people. You can really see it in some of the people you meet in clubs.
However, I think there is so much more to Berlin than clubbing. People talk about Berlin in a way that is very reductive, especially people who haven't lived here. The city has such an interesting history, a great food scene, loads of amazing sports and running clubs. It's diverse and you can meet people from all around the world. Live music in Berlin is amazing and I have seen so many awesome smaller artists play in amazing venues. There are so many beautiful lakes, nature and forests and lots of sustainability projects. I consciously made friends with people who are not "stuck" in the club scene because it's just not what I want to surround myself with. I think that's a really important thing to cultivate friendship circles who will lift you up, wherever you live.
I lived in London for five years before moving here. It's funny because to me, London feels like the most transient place ever! I had so many friends come and go there - unless you're from London and have roots there, most people you know eventually leave. I think that's simply the tough experience of being an expat - you simply don't have the same sense of community that you have in your home city/town. I am planning to stay in Berlin long term and something I'm trying to do is forge connections here that will last.
It for sure is complicated and thanks for writing about it in such a raw way. I really wish you the best in your soul searching ✨
Really interesting reflections here. I feel like I need to voicenote you a response haha because I'll end up writing a part 2 essay in the comments if I have to express my thoughts here.
Well said! Felt a lot of the same when I lived in Berlin, even though just for a few months for work, and even though it was fun. A certain type of homogeneity posturing as something else.
Totally! And so many wonderful people have made a happy home there. There are pros and cons to every place - all about knowing which ones work best for you.
Also, have you already joined one of our meetings? And are you in our Telegram group? Sorry I lost track of who is who haha I feel like you were there in our last meet up but I couldn't see you in our Telegram group
I'm so glad you started writing! This piece hit me with so many emotions similar to the ones you talked about. It's difficult to break through and understand, but you do it well. You'll find that cafe where the owner shares a musical taste similar to yours, and the ladies at the salon will be blessed to have you as a part of their lives, wherever that may be. Cheers Rez.
Thanks for reading Otis, appreciate it!! And I hope so too :)
I could so relate to this. After 3 years in Berlin I realised it’s like you exactly described - a drift. London, Mumbai, NYC feels more like the places where you’re seen and can create real community and space. All the best with finding your favourite places. The journey matters. The destination/s show up in the end ✨✨
Aww thank you for reading! I feel the same about those places too! Let’s see what happens but I’m definitely in a better space now :) And I hope it works out for you too!! x
I resonate so much with what you're saying. I too have been living in Berlin for three years now. I am German so living here is easy for me in so many ways. But before living here, I was living Canada, a stone's throw away from the Rocky Mountains. A very different lifestyle to the one I have now. Back then, my weekends were filled with mountain adventures. These days they're filled with art galleries, wine bars, events. Not one better than the other but I do have to say that life in Berlin has left me feeling hollow lately. I've been chasing a life of materialism, acceptance and trying to fit in that I don't even want. I know why I am here but I also know that I won't be here forever.
Thanks for reading, yeah it’s definitely better but I always have those moments like what am I doing here haha, it can be hard to navigate x
Ah! Thank you! A lot of it very relatable. I always felt that it's like "you can have it all here" but in the end you feel kind of left with nothing. And people keep leaving, it's a very transitional place. =( Also keep stalking my neighbors so we become friends but I should probably go back to Georgia if I need neighborly connections haha!
I’ve heard it’s really friendly there!!
I loved this Rez!! 🥹 Your piece was very touching but also showed how not everything is meant to be and that’s okay. You’re on your journey of growth and it’s beautiful to see that maybe Berlin isn’t for you and you’re going to explore further. Thank you for taking us along, sending you lots and lots of love 🤍
Thank you so much, appreciate it! That’s life isn’t it but it’s so good to see the bigger picture too :) <3
Exactly!!! All about the bigger picture <33
A powerful insight. I've just moved here after spending 5 years in London. I'm a little bit too fresh to make a judgment call on how much this city will become a home to me. But your words about the camaraderie in London hit home. When I lived there, it felt like everybody was struggling to keep their head above water and there was some beauty in that. Where we were all united in the struggle and sharing in the pain and the pleasure that ensued.
Thanks so much for reading Paddy, yes I definitely feel that. And I mean, everyone will have their own experience of Berlin but I think I feel like this for a number of reasons but I really do hope you have a lovely time here!
Well articulated. Fascinating to read that London offered that integrated community feeling. I never found it in Paris or NYC personally, only in the expat hubs of Yangon or Nairobi (with their attending challenges). Keep on writing!
Everyones got their place and not without challenges! Thank you :)
Wow, this really touched me, Rez. I relate to every word you've written. I've been living here for eight years, and everything I used to love about this city just irritates me these days. I don't feel at home here anymore. I lived in the UK for twelve years, six of which were in London, and I miss it so much. I feel very nostalgic about my life back then, but I'm not sure if moving back would be the right decision.
Berlin feels like a golden cage for many of us. My rent is very cheap, my salary is good working for a corporate company, and generally, it's cheaper here than in most other European cities. However, despite these advantages, it's not enough for me. I no longer feel inspired by this city. I was trying to explain this to my therapist the other day; it feels like I've outgrown the city, and it doesn't nourish my soul anymore.
I have some travel plans over the winter, so I will be away quite a bit, but in the spring, I seriously want to consider where to move next.
Thank you for reading! It's a tough one isn't it, it's like you know there's more out there but you're right it's these little things like the cheap rent and your job etc that kind of keep you here but I just can't anymore. Thank you for sharing your insight too! <3
Really enjoyed reading these mixed feelings you have about Berlin. I've been living in Berlin for four years, and personally I love it. I keep the club scene at arm's length. I sometimes go along with friends, but I probably only go a handful of times per year. Clubbing can be fun, but I agree, it 1) is awfully repetitive and 2) just doesn't give my soul anything. I also agree with you that Berlin attracts a lot of lost people. You can really see it in some of the people you meet in clubs.
However, I think there is so much more to Berlin than clubbing. People talk about Berlin in a way that is very reductive, especially people who haven't lived here. The city has such an interesting history, a great food scene, loads of amazing sports and running clubs. It's diverse and you can meet people from all around the world. Live music in Berlin is amazing and I have seen so many awesome smaller artists play in amazing venues. There are so many beautiful lakes, nature and forests and lots of sustainability projects. I consciously made friends with people who are not "stuck" in the club scene because it's just not what I want to surround myself with. I think that's a really important thing to cultivate friendship circles who will lift you up, wherever you live.
I lived in London for five years before moving here. It's funny because to me, London feels like the most transient place ever! I had so many friends come and go there - unless you're from London and have roots there, most people you know eventually leave. I think that's simply the tough experience of being an expat - you simply don't have the same sense of community that you have in your home city/town. I am planning to stay in Berlin long term and something I'm trying to do is forge connections here that will last.
It for sure is complicated and thanks for writing about it in such a raw way. I really wish you the best in your soul searching ✨
Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts on this! <3
This is a wonderful perspective and the one that resonates with me the most about Berlin. Just about to start year 13.
Oh wow that’s such a long time! Do you like living here?
If I was to write a comment from scratch I would've written a very similar one. Good luck with your future endeavours Rez!
Thank you! 🙏🏽🌼
I think it's so important to know when something isn't for you anymore. Great post.
Really interesting reflections here. I feel like I need to voicenote you a response haha because I'll end up writing a part 2 essay in the comments if I have to express my thoughts here.
Great read, provoking a lot of thought and emotion.
Keep these articles coming!!
Thank you for writing that. I went on the same journey after endless holidays to Ibiza in my 20s.
Lovely reflections! I lived in Berlin for 6 years and felt the same. Really resonates! I wrote about my experience leaving Berlin. Thought I’d share 😊https://open.substack.com/pub/theblended/p/find-the-where-where-your-who-is?r=3styn&utm_medium=ios
Aw thank you for sharing this, just had a read! It's such an interesting place isn't it.
Well said! Felt a lot of the same when I lived in Berlin, even though just for a few months for work, and even though it was fun. A certain type of homogeneity posturing as something else.
Yes exactly but again it's not for everyone right.
Totally! And so many wonderful people have made a happy home there. There are pros and cons to every place - all about knowing which ones work best for you.
Exactly that!! Gotta find where your soho feels happiness
Also, have you already joined one of our meetings? And are you in our Telegram group? Sorry I lost track of who is who haha I feel like you were there in our last meet up but I couldn't see you in our Telegram group
No I've never come to the meet ups! I'd love to next time :)
Yaayyy that’s great. I will DM you with the telegram group link and the next meet-up registration link 🖤 Happy Sunday Rez
Thank you 🙏🏽🙏🏽