Travelling in Bangladesh Solo as a British Bangladeshi Woman
It’s already uncommon for people to travel to Bangladesh, and it's even more uncommon for solo female travellers to go through Bangladesh.
It was over a month ago when I first set foot in Bangladesh on 27th November 2023, and since then, so much has happened. Happy New Year?!
As many of you know, a significant portion of my family is from Bangladesh, they moved to London in the 60s and 70s. They originally come from Sylhet, much like many Bangladeshis who have moved to London.
I flew into Dhaka, everything about the city felt hectic. If you aren’t a seasoned traveller, you 100% need a guide. It took me 2 hours to get out of the airport because I was adhering to Western rules (a queue). This does not exist in Dhaka. What I also learned very quickly was that the rules are different for Bangladeshis and foreigners (even though I’m Bangladeshi). So, that means you can walk right up to the front and not queue, which feels terrible but honestly, after the chaos in the airport, I was like, "screw it, anything to speed this process up."
The first hotel I stayed at was completely run by men, no women in sight. Even though they were super lovely, it was still a little uncomfortable because they don’t know how to act around a solo Bangladeshi woman. Normally, you wouldn’t even shake hands with a woman because it’s quite a conservative Muslim country. So even that was awkward at first and then I just went around fist-bumping everyone, which felt way more halal.
The sooner you stop comparing it to India, the better. Because the experience there is just so different. You’re now navigating a country that is way more conservative and isn’t used to tourists; there wasn’t a path or route people take—everything I did, I was learning on the go. Like what’s palatable for a foreigner and what’s not.
At first, Dhaka looks like an incredibly chaotic place, with electrical wires hanging from everywhere, confusing signs, and it’s just so busy and loud. But every day it got a bit easier, and my Bengali also improved day by day, which makes life easier. I mainly Ubered everywhere and caught CNGs. Towards the end of my trip, I started taking motorbike taxis everywhere because that is truly how you beat traffic, safe? I don’t know about that. Don’t let the men running the hotels see though because they get really concerned. A girl on the back of a bike? They’d have a heart attack if they knew I used to own one too..
I was connected to friends of friends, which made the trip a little easier. I was able to get a better insight into the food culture out there and also places to stay. Some of the people I was connected to owned resorts and hotels, so I did end up staying in some of them outside of Dhaka, which also made me feel safer.
The rule of thumb for me was, yes, you can walk around by yourself during the day. If you don’t converse with people too much, they might just think you’re from a wealthier part of Dhaka. But if you do start conversing, they can quickly tell you’re not from there. I also did my best to blend in, so I was wearing traditional clothes most of the time or loose-fitted clothes that cover most of my body. This was important as I was walking around by myself a lot. So I didn’t want to attract more attention than necessary. In the evening, when it got dark, I didn’t go out by myself. If I was coming back from a place, I made sure I was dropped off outside, or it was a very short walk because the ideology there is, "Well, why is she out by herself in the first place?" rather than "Let's protect women." With 87% women of Bangladesh faced domestic, physical, mental, economic or sexual violence. Just don’t risk it.
I moved around a lot because I wanted to get to know different places so I could also suggest where's best. But one particular hotel, which was the best for me as a solo traveller, was The Way Hotel. This was the most comfortable hotel out of them all, with a small gym, sauna, and pool on the rooftop. Great breakfast and amazing coffee, and there were a mix of both men and women working at the hotel. But of course, I got asked “Are you married? And if not, why?” by one of the staff members. I guess it’s just so weird for them to see someone who kind of looks like them at my big age of 29 not being married. Towards the end, I was like, honestly bhai, this is a problem in the West. We want it all, I just can’t find the right person. But if you know anyone, let a sis know!
All this travelling alone in Bangladesh isn’t cheap, you know. Having drivers, security, you can’t stay in cheap places; it’s just not safe, so you’re forced to stay in the best hotels. Some mid-range hotels don’t even let women stay alone in the hotels because they don’t want the hassle. And again, if I were a dude, it would be way cheaper because I wouldn’t have to worry about staying in certain hotels or having security or buying a new wardrobe? A night at The Way Hotel can set you back 140 euros a night.
It's weird because it was a genuinely nice experience, and people are so friendly—overly friendly, to the point where you might think they want something from you. However, misogyny is rampant out there. I experienced being followed in broad daylight by a random dude in Lalbagh Fort, and when I informed security, they didn't seem to take it seriously, just saying, “Oh, he won't do anything.” Eventually, the guy asked for a picture. I firmly declined. Adapting to a more male-dominated society was quite challenging and I don't think I'll go back by myself, even though I now have a much better understanding of the country. Unfortunately, it's just easier and safer to travel with a man or in a group. It's wild because the country is run by a woman??
It's difficult to talk about this because I don't want to say anything negative about the country. However, most of the men I interacted with had no idea how challenging it is to travel solo as a woman. I didn't even feel comfortable going to restaurants in the evening alone because you'd have all the waiters watching you eat—it truly feels like being a bit of a zoo animal. Some men are aware of how bad it is but won't do anything about it; they just accept that it's tough for women. I do feel like if you were a white woman, maybe you'd get treated better? There's a bit of a thing where they would look at you like, 'Wait, you're one of us, so why are you out and about like that?'
Also, every single woman I spoke to had a negative story about men out there and how much of a glass ceiling there is or just how you have to behave to survive out there. One comment that really stuck out to me was, “Well, Rez, if you wanna survive here, you kinda have to be a bitch.”
I'm not saying it's impossible, but you have to be well-travelled, speaking a bit of Bengali really helps, and you have to be confident. Thank God for apps like Uber, which makes it much easier to get around without constantly haggling prices. But there you go—that's my word vomit of a newsletter. I'll tell you all about the food in the next one!
The track I’ll leave you with you with today is Stand By Me by Ben E. King.
Love,
Rez x